Manifesto of Confident People Series #4
It’s kind of fun to do the impossible. –Walt Disney
They said that dreaming is for free and so no one should stop you from doing so. It’s not just being a prince and a princess in a fairy tale can we dream about. We can also dream about great things that we want to do in our life. It can be material, spiritual, personal or in whatever dimension it is.
Dream about marrying your dream girl, riding on a limousine, winning the American Idol, becoming a millionaire, helping thousands of homeless people. There you are. I just gave you examples so you can start dreaming again.
You might have forgotten to dream after waking up into reality and was disappointed.
But in order for you to achieve any purpose in life, it has to start with a dream.
Where do you start?
1. Have a vision in mind
If you don’t make a conscious effort to visualize who you are and what you want in life, then you empower other people and circumstances to shape you and your life by default. – Stephen Covey on Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
You might not even have to exert an effort to do this. You might have thought you stopped dreaming but you caught yourself daydreaming a while ago. Gotcha!
What are you aspiring for? What is that burning passion you have? What do you want to be 5 years from now? 10 years from now?
If you want to be a confident person, how do you see yourself as such? A person who talks to strangers about new products? A person who talks in front of a large audience? A person who faces conflicts without getting rattled? A person who asserts himself in face of challenging questions?
2. Cast your dreams into stone
Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.– Benjamin Franklin
I had a friend who called it ‘Life Plan’. Indeed, any responsible person who holds his life dear and that of his loved ones, should write a plan how he wants to direct his life.
Surely not everything in life can be controlled. But you can control what is in your sphere of influence.
How do people make a plan? Months back I found someone on Facebook say “I just finished making my dream board”. The moment she said that and described what she used- some cork board, a few images and some colored pens, it sparked curiosity in me. Indeed dreaming uses a lot of creativity to spur more details and color into it. I ended up writing about the dream board in my personal blog.
Having a vision in mind is not enough. If you want to take that seriously, make the next step by putting it in black and white. Surely, the next thing people will say is that “This person is serious about his crazy dream!”
Put your dreams into writing where you can see it- to remind yourself of it.
If you want to be a confident person, how do you creatively make a dream board? How about put an image of a person confidently speaking in front of an audience? …a successful person looking at his accomplishments?
3. Take responsibility
I have more respect for the fellow with a single idea who gets there than for the fellow with a thousand ideas who does nothing. — Thomas Edison
This is the hard part. Once you have created your dream board, it would feel great to imagine things and get back to day dreaming.
Hang on there. Dreaming does not end there.
Keep a notebook (maybe your planner) to record and check it out daily or weekly to see what are the little steps you will do and have done to achieve your dream.
What are you going to write in your little notebook? You can ask questions like these: How do you take responsibility to become a confident person? How about speaking today about this issue I have with this person? …speaking in the first five minutes in a meeting even to just break the ice? …getting prepared for a conversation with your boss by having the numbers right?
5. Get a Performance Partner
It is easier to dream and keep it to yourself. If you do that, no one will know in case you fail. That’s how to play it safe. And chances would be low to get your dream become a reality.
I know it is challenging but the only way to make your dream a reality is to tell it to someone and make yourself accountable.
You should have started talking about your dreams to someone- your parents, your friends or your spouse. Go an extra mile further by taking him or her through the steps of what you are doing in one detail or another. Ask his help to make you accountable and let him play a devil’s advocate- not to discourage you but to remind you when you slip or challenge you when you are discouraged.
How do you go about finding your performance partner? Have a casual talk with your girlfriend and tell her about this? Write an email to a drinking buddy about the idea? How about enlisting yourself in our FREE pilot Manifesto Mastermind Meetup?
6. Start with a single step, then little acts of discipline
Every strike brings me closer to the next home run. –Babe Ruth
Who goes into war and confidently say he is ready? They are the ones who are well prepared from training. First, they decide to go to training, enlist themselves, and go through the basics such as waking up early, performing tough exercises, practicing detailed movements, delaying comforts, etc.
If you want to be a confident person, how do you want to start the single step? What will you need to give up today to start your deposits of confidence? Stop worrying about what others will say? Stop resenting what you just did a while ago about talking to this person? Train yourself to focus on the important points for the meeting?
7. Get some inspiration
All these steps that I am mentioning is a fun exercise and it should be!
In Series #2, I quoted from the song “Don’t Stop Believing”. There are a lot of other songs that have inspired many of us ever since. And I believe a lot of you had that experience. Why not use it again? It does wonders.
You can also dig into other inspirations from success stories, inspirational movies, quotations or anything that can be memorable for you that it would be easy to stick it in your head and heart. Even when not into these inspirations directly, you can easily draw them again.
That is why music is one of the most useful tools to do this.
Here’s a list of favorite inspirational pop songs from Celestine Chua of Personal Excellence: 25 Most Inspirational Songs of All Time
What inspiration boosts your energy?
8. Surround yourself with people who dream and do
Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher — Oprah Winfrey
This is easier said than done. While browsing through the net, I discovered how one personal development blogger gave up his friends because they were not doing him any help in achieving in his life. Well perhaps, his friends were those who go to him every day and enjoy a lazy life.
Apart from the source of strength to keep you going, find other people who get things done and make things happen. Find these people already around you because you need to hang out with them more often. Go further by joining clubs/organizations or meeting new people. This can broaden your horizon in terms of the way you think, the way you do things and the way you socialize with others. This will also help you think and do things positively and in the right direction. If sadness spreads like a virus, positivity also infects!
How can you improve your current relationships that will encourage you to achieve your dreams? Which organizations or teams can you enlist to so you can sharpen your specific skills and also surround you with role models? Have you ever thought of joining our FREE pilot Manifesto Mastermind Meetup in November?
Start your dream now by making the first step. What do you see yourself five years from now? How about 10 years from now? share your answers for a start.
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PHOTO CREDIT: Christian Haugen